What makes a horse successful?

The horse: human bond is an interesting one. Communication is through body language, not through a verbal language and each species has different needs and priorities.

Long ago I learnt that any kind of success with horses required there to be a way of communicating. I needed to know when they were injured and unwell. They already knew me, because reading other beings is their primary language. They however also (in my experience) learn our word-based language, just as we must learn how to ask them to move about, wear equipment and give their feet - to name a few examples.

What expedited my communication with them was learning to listen with my whole body - just as they do.

Children are naturally able to do this, they haven't shut down their ability yet, but as we grow older our society unfortunately prioritises other things and the ability is forgotten or even worse, criticised as being "too sensitive".

Yet I would say being aware of the experiences of another is a wonderful skill to have! What a harmonious, tolerant and compassionate society we would have if the feelings and experiences of our neighbour were as important as our own.

No "I, me, mine" as my Reiki teacher would say. Instead interconnectedness, and a desire for all beings to be well and prosper.

Horses naturally do this. They share the responsibility of grief, anger, sadness, disorientation and frustration. You'll see them appear to be dozing, looking inwards, yawning, rolling, shaking, licking and chewing as they process the energy that has walked into their space. Sometimes, if it's more than they want to deal with self-preservation will kick in and they'll leave.

It is a survival instinct. Held and heavy emotions are a danger to the herd. Horses release emotions as soon as possible so they can return to a state of calm.

There is much we can learn from horses about this:

1) held emotions are dangerous and a risk to the health of the herd

2) emotions must be experienced and released for health and healing

3) processing emotions is more important than eating, grooming or sleeping (though less important than moving to safety)

4) we can experience the emotions of others because we are interconnected

5) we can release our emotions and the emotions of others through our body

6) emotions return to earth.

I learnt all of this during the pandemic, when I noticed how much emotional release my herd did with clients. I would see stress resolving behaviours as soon as clients would enter the horse's space. I also learnt their limits on releasing other people's emotions and adjusted their schedule accordingly so they were never asked to do more than they would willingly handle.

We live in a culture where we are encouraged to numb our emotions and carry on. We use things like medication, technology (e.g. phones), sweet foods, alcohol and exercise to prevent us experiencing what is uncomfortable and we're taught not to feel because the consequences of feeling our feelings is inconvenient.

Horses suggest a different path. They suggest slowing down and co-regulating with nature. They suggest saying it like it is, owning it, experiencing it and then letting it go - for good. No revisiting it over and over in your mind, they suggest moving on and having a fresh experience, just like they move in to fresh grazing.

I far prefer the horse approach to reality. It has left me with a freer and healthier body, a clearer mind, a more open heart, a more interconnected relationship with the earth and a greater feeling of abundance. I feel lighter, more resourced and calm. I am grateful and life is a joy.

This is what the horses and I share with clients, a window into this world and the permission to stay that way when they leave. Between us, clients included, we're creating a quiet revolution of calm. We take that calmness out into the world and share it with others. We make choices out of love, not fear, and prioritise health and wellness over status and possessions.

All this because the horse, the animal that so many people think they can dominate and extort for their own gain, chooses to show up for us day after day, patiently waiting for us to wake up and experience what they know and what makes them successful.

That is love, in action.

And I am so grateful.